Experiences repeat themselves until they are learned. –John Gray
Some people seem to experience recurring problems in relationships, it doesn’t matter how many times they change partners, jobs, or friends, the same issues arise again and again. For other people money is a problem. They may have the tendency to overspend and run up debts, then they reorganise their finances vowing this will never happen again and before long they are back where they started, or in a worse position.
Recurring patterns are your signposts, and your opportunities, although they never feel like it at the time. If you have any type of recurring problem you have an opportunity to face your fears, by doing so you free yourself from having to experience the same situations over and over again.
It’s tempting at these times to look at what’s causing the problem externally, in other words to blame someone, or something else. This could be the Government, your employer, the economy, or another person. If you’re not blaming someone else you might be blaming yourself.
It doesn’t matter whether you are right or wrong, the fact is that acting in this way won’t change the situation nor will it help you create a life you love.
When you acknowledge that you have control over your life and you stop blaming other people for the situation you’re in, then you are ready to face your fears. When you do this you will find that you have one of three opportunities, sometimes you have all three rolled into one.
Opportunity Two: You are able to realise what emotional benefit you are gaining — the pay-off – from having your problems.
Some examples of pay-offs:
You get attention – eg always having a problem to talk about.
You take revenge – eg a teenager working below abilities or not working, could be taking revenge against a controlling parent.
Opportunity Three: You can face some unresolved emotions that need to be dealt with.
Source; “Love The Life You Live” - Anne Hartly
You need to allow yourself to feel, most of us were conditioned not to show anger or fear.
John Gray describes how some emotions support you in remaining ‘stuck’, while other emotions allow you to heal.
Emotions that keep you Emotions that allow you
bonded to your pain to heal
Blame, hate, resentment anger
Anxiety, self pity fear
Guilt, doubt sadness
Depression, hopelessness, sorrow
“Every event in life can be causing only one of two things. Either it is good for you, or it is bringing up what you need to look at in order to create good for you.” – Deepak Chopra
Have a look at this movie “No glass ceiling” - http://www.flickspire.com/m/iaaw/NoGlassCeiling